Is Marriage Coaching For You?

Is Marriage Coaching For You?

Lisa’s thoughts on marriage coaching…

I think marriage coaching can be beneficial for everyone, we all walk through life seeking approval and guidance from those around us in different areas in our lives, why should our marriages be any different?

 Men will approach their buddies about what to do about a certain situation at home or to complain about something not going on at home.  Women make coffee appointments with their girlfriends to discuss issues that are concerning them or to complain about their husbands.  We all want to be heard, be encouraged, and maybe gain a nugget of wisdom of how we can change something or do something better.

 Can you think of one couple that you would prefer to ask questions about your marriage, you know, that one couple who you feel has their marriage together and would give you sound advice.

If you have a couple in mind, that is fantastic!  Having someone in your life to meet this need is a blessing; some of you may know of a couple but you don’t know them well enough to ask or they are too close to your situation for you to feel comfortable sharing intimate details of your marriage with them.  And sadly, some of you don’t know of a couple that you would trust or look up to in this way, it is becoming increasingly hard to find couples to look to for advice.

Sometimes in life, we need a third party to help us see what we can’t see on our own.

There are many areas in life where we spend time and money educating ourselves and learning skills to help us succeed.  Some of us may do it to further our jobs; some of us may get a tutor while in school; some of us may learn how to fix our dishwasher at home; depending on the issue at hand, we seek out information from different sources.  It is human nature to figure out a problem set in front of us, and if the internet doesn’t cut it, we seek professional advice.

Why do we have such a hard time building skills and seeking advice in our marriages?

Our marriage is the single most important relationship in our life, why don’t we spend time learning how to be married?  Why do we wait until we have a major problem and our marriage has to be saved before we will step out and seek guidance?  I feel we spend more time learning to drive a car than we do to drive a marriage.  Why would we leave this most important aspect of our lives to chance?  Why don’t we educate ourselves along the way?

I believe marriage coaching has created a marriage relationship for me that I would not have been able to attain any other way!

Through attending and teaching marriage workshops and study groups, I have learned important skills in communication, conflict resolution, financial management, sexual intimacy, parenting, etc., the list goes on and on.  I have also learned invaluable lessons about my marriage through the two on two couples coaching sessions Greg and I have with other couples.  These meetings bring out situations we may not have known were present for us and then we can resolve them, that is priceless, I don’t want a bunch of garbage hanging over my head in my marriage.

Marriage coaches are people who devote their lives to helping marriages, they may not be university trained, but they have knowledge for you to gain from and they will share their lives with you in a way that a professional counselor never will.

I am not knocking professional counseling, I feel their is a time and a place for that if needed.  I do think that meeting two to two with another married couple has benefits that you cannot get from going one to two, and getting the perspectives of a couple who is married and who spend their time focusing on marriage is beneficial.  Spending the time building your marriage on a regular basis instead of trying to treat it in an emergency will create stability and longevity for your marriage relationship and your family.  For more information on marriage coaching at Loveseat Marriage, click here.

Is marriage coaching for you?

SEX IS “SACRED”

SEX IS “SACRED”

Many times I have heard fellow believers utter the words “sex is sacred” and it seems to be delivered under the guise, via body language and the tonality of words, that’s “talking” about sex is taboo and that we are not to talk about sex.

HORSE PUCKY!

Do you know how many people have been in our facility with something broken about their sex life because they never appropriately talked about it?

ALL OF THEM!!!

We can talk about it and pervert and twist it in our secular lives, but on Sunday we are offended?

No wonder our churches are suffering from sexual cancers beyond comprehension.  If we continue to avoid sex as a topic in healthy conversation we are just incubating the devastating potential of broken people, broken homes, and severely damaged legacies for our children.

You know what they say about types of cancer, “Early detection is the best prevention”.  So the longer we are quiet, the bigger it gets and the more damage done and that gets passed on.

Take a peek here at the definitions:

Full Definition of SACRED
1 a : dedicated or set apart for the service or worship of a deity <a treesacred to the gods>
   b : devoted exclusively to one service or use (as of a person or purpose)<a fund sacred to charity>
2 a : worthy of religious veneration : holy
   b : entitled to reverence and respect
3 : of or relating to religion : not secular or profane <sacred music>
4 : archaic : accursed
5 a : unassailable, inviolable
   b : highly valued and important <a sacred responsibility>

I could NOT find where it is “not to be spoken about, nor spoken of”, but this bible verse is highlighted by the holy spirit to me as an out of context but parallel message to me:

Titus 2 New International Version (NIV)
2 You, however, must teach what is appropriate to sound doctrine. 2 Teach the older men to be temperate, worthy of respect, self-controlled, and sound in faith, in love and in endurance.
3 Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. 4 Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, 5 to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.
6 Similarly, encourage the young men to be self-controlled. 7 In everything set them an example by doing what is good. In your teaching show integrity, seriousness 8 and soundness of speech that cannot be condemned, so that those who oppose you may be ashamed because they have nothing bad to say about us.
9 Teach slaves to be subject to their masters in everything, to try to please them, not to talk back to them, 10 and not to steal from them, but to show that they can be fully trusted, so that in every way they will make the teaching about God our Savior attractive.
11 For the grace of God has appeared that offers salvation to all people. 12 It teaches us to say “No” to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age, 13 while we wait for the blessed hope—the appearing of the glory of our great God and Savior, Jesus Christ, 14 who gave himself for us to redeem us from all wickedness and to purify for himself a people that are his very own, eager to do what is good.
15 These, then, are the things you should teach. Encourage and rebuke with all authority. Do not let anyone despise you.

So, yes sex IS sacred, if churches are so eager to preach and teach on tithing (mentioned roughly 36 times in the bible) let’s also create a culture where on a purity platform we can inform couples about good sex, healthy sex, and pure sex. (Sex is mentioned or alluded to so many times in the bible I didn’t bother to count)

Church, teach us that sex is good as it was intended by GOD to bless a marriage